Passion Through Grief
by azzy234jace
Summary: Remi Peltier is the brother everyone is afraid of because of his explosive temper, and the fact everyone is scared of him kills him. Safiya Collins, who became an orphan after an "accident" killed her mother, father, and twin brother Dylan, only comes to find out through a series of clues that more than just a runaway truck played a hand in her family's death. Rated M for later ;)
1. Chapter 1

Contrary to popular belief, Remi Peltier didn't often wake up in a bad mood. The bad mood usually  
began when he looked into a mirror and swore he could see his twin brother Quinn staring - _laughing_ \- at  
him. Such a thing had caused a broken mirror a time or two.

But today was one of those other days - the days he awoke boiling with a rage that he couldn't  
explain. The need to start a fight or, at the very least, punch something sat just beneath the skin, causing  
a feeling like an itch.

It was an itch he was determined not to scratch as just within the past week, he'd started - and  
ended - enough fights that he'd need a third hand to count them all. So he intentionally ignored the mirror  
on his way to the shower and on his way out of the bathroom, toweling his body dry before throwing his  
long blond hair up into a sort of bun that sat low at the back of his head.

He pulled on a pair of tattered black jeans - were they in the basket because someone had done  
his laundry, or were they dirty? A mystery - and his Sanctuary uniform shirt before heading through the  
house and to the bar.

The Peltier house, a menagerie for an assortment of were-hunters who needed a home, was  
adjoined to the family bar via a door leading to the back of the bar - an area off limits to customers. Not  
only was that where their stock was kept, but the chance of a cub or two wiggling into there was high,  
and wiping a human mind was a pain.

Remi made his way to the kitchen, cutting off some bratty remark from the head chef - he really  
wasn't in the mood. Near immediately the atmosphere of the room changed. Everyone fell silent, going  
about their jobs while keeping the talking to a minimum.

Not that they were scared of Remi - well, maybe a little - they just couldn't afford to piss him off  
further and have him ditch work. Not only was he a dishwasher, but he was a fast cook when needed and  
kept ticket times to within ten minutes - which near earned him a record, as he didn't pre-make any of the  
dishes.

First thing first. After tying on his apron, Remi went to check on the soups and gumbo that  
would have just been started and left to simmer so they'd be ready in time for the dinner rush. Next he  
checked on the meats that had been slow cooked through the night and were ready to be served. Not his  
job, but no one seemed to want to point that out to him.

Once he knew everything was where it should be, he put on his hair net - Dev was once socked  
in the jaw for laughing at said hair net - and grabbed the tickets that were waiting to be filled. The dishes  
could wait a few while he helped the kitchen catch up with the orders.

Hours seemed to pass by in a flash as he cooked and cleaned, rolling his eyes whenever his  
brothers or sister came to bother him. By the end of his first shift, he'd managed to work out most of the  
anger from his body.

Now he just felt empty, which was somehow worse than the boiling rage. At least, went he was  
angry, he knew he could still feel something, that he still existed. But this emptiness was cold and  
unforgiving, sucking the life from him little by little.

His world had gone dark years before, when his own brother had accidentally claimed the woman  
who'd had Remi's heart. She was his light, and she was taken, leaving him in this unfamiliar cold and  
colorless world.

 _ **No, stop thinking about her.**_ He begged himself as tears pricked at his eyes. But the floodgates  
had opened. All he could think about was the night he'd lost her, when she'd mistaken Quinn for Remi and  
crawled into his brother's lap.

Now they had children and slept in the same bed. Don't get him wrong - he loved his nieces and  
nephews. It was their father he couldn't stand to be around.

He couldn't remember having spoken more than a handful of words to his own twin in years. Each  
time he thought he could move passed it and begin to rebuild their bond, he'd see the two of them together  
and go through the stages of grief all over again.

And Remi saw what happened to his older brother when he'd lost his twin. He didn't want to have  
any regrets should anything happen to one of the other quadruplets. And that, above all, was what left him  
so...empty.

* * *

Safiya Sachdeva sat waiting for her meeting with the dean of Tulane, tears flowing down her cheeks.

Not even a week before finding herself in New Orleans had she gotten the call that her parents and  
twin brother had perished in an accident with a runaway semi. The driver of the semi had tried to steer clear,  
but few things can halt a truck that big once it has it's course.

Why was she crying in the first place? She'd left her family when she was sixteen, fully able to  
support herself through online work and the two books she'd published as a teen. Her parents had once tried  
to steal her money before belittling her for trying to save that money for her future.

Harsh words turned into abuse shortly after, as with her growing success - any normal parent would  
have been proud - her parents' fuses got shorter and shorter until her mother had made Safiya fear for her life.

Them, she could care less about, if she was being brutally honest.

But it was her brother, Dylan, that was hurting her. She hadn't spoken to him in years - not only  
because she'd cut him off when she'd left her parents, but because the one time he spoke to her afterward, he'd  
asked for money.

In hindsight, he hadn't asked for much and had begged her to help him just that once. He'd sounded  
so desperate that, if she'd been in a better place herself, she would have helped him.

Her brother was brilliant, well on his way to becoming a historian. Now that she was here and saw what  
he'd achieved, it shattered her heart to think of what potential he could have had. Now there was just a hole where  
her brother should have been - no sibling could be replaced, but the bond twins shared was something else  
entirely.

"You okay?" A male voice pulled her up from drowning in her sadness, Safiya looking up to see who was  
speaking to her.

He was too beautiful to be a teacher, she thought. With blond hair and a build made for the gods, Safiya  
couldn't help but stare a moment before she was able to respond. Blue eyes set into a chiseled face that told her of  
historic origins and great genetics, a hard muscled body hidden away by a button down shirt that could have possibly  
been just a size too small for the man.

"I'm fine." Her voice cracked, making it very clear she was not fine. A shaky hand raised to brush back her  
dark brown hair from her face before offering a fake smile.

"What's wrong?" He asked in a soft, soothing voice, glancing from Safiya to the dean's office. "Fail a final?"

"I'm not a student." Safiya responded just as a woman opened the door to the office.

"Miss Sachdeva, the dean is ready for you." The woman gave her a warm smile before her eyes travelled  
over to see the other person waiting outside the office. "Professor Alexander. What can I do for you?"

Safiya moved to press by the woman, not interested in what the two were about to talk about - until she  
heard the man's name. She turned around, interrupting their conversation. "Excuse me," She moved around the  
woman yet again. "Professor Alexander?"

The man gave her a dazzling smile. "That would be me. But please, only students call me professor." He  
held out a hand to her. "Julian."

Safiya shook his hand. "My brother was in your class. Ready to become some sort of assistant as I understand?"

Julian's face fell at her words, dropping her hand as he spoke. "You're Dylan's sister? I'm so sorry for what  
I - I'm sorry for your loss. He never said he had a sister."

"We weren't close." Was the simplest answer she could think to give.

"Ah." He nodded solemnly in understanding. "Are you here to collect his things?"

"That and stop payment of his tuiton." She wasn't about to pay anything for classes no one was attending.

"I've got some things of his in my office if you want them." Julian offered.

Safiya nodded. "Sure. I'll...uhm...find my way after I talk to the dean. Thanks."

Julian nodded, Safiya turning to go into the office and speak with the dean so she could get out of this school.  
All this place was doing was giving her heartache, and she'd had enough in her lifetime.

She'd been through divorce, from a relationship that was rocky in the first place as her ex-wife had never liked  
the fact Safiya wasn't in contact with her parents. And now, she'd lost her family, and had no way to contact her extended  
family on either side. She was left to deal with this aftermath.

Alone.

After what seemed like an hour of just the dean apologizing for her loss, he directed her to the payment office,  
where she could submit a claim and have her brother's tuition payments cancelled. The claim office told her she would receive  
an email when it was approved.

With that weight off her chest, Safiya asked for directions to Julian's office. After a wrong turn and getting lost,  
she was about to simply collapsed against the wall and cry. All she wanted to do was scream and cry, her body aching for  
her to release the emotions she was bottling up. But luckily for her, she spotted a student.

"Excuse me!" She called, jogging to catch him. He turned and smiled, though he looked a little startled someone  
was calling out to him. "Can you tell me where Professor Alexander's office is?"

"Down the hall, second right and first left. It'll be the fifth door on the right." He answered before adding, "I'm  
heading that way myself if you want me to show you."

"Please." She offered a thankful smile before offering her hand. "Safiya...Collins."

Recognition of her maiden last name flickered across his face. "Dylan's sister. I'm sorry." He offered his  
condolences and Safiya wanted to throw up. "I'm Alex. He was a friend of mine." He shook her hand, letting go before he  
began to walk.

Safiya followed, quiet for a moment before she had to ask, "How did you know Dylan?"

Alex scratched his head. "We had some of the same classes. Professor Alexander is a mutual friend, so we hung  
out a lot together when I went to visit him."

Safiya nodded. "Seems like everyone liked him."

"Well, most people that take Professor Alexander's class do. Dylan liked to debate him. He never won, but he tried.  
He was friends with a lot of the history nerds around here." Alex pushed through some slow walkers. "He came to my family's  
bar after school and played pool a few times a week. He was good too."

Safiya's heart grew heavier and heavier with each word. She hadn't known him at all. She'd never even tried and  
now it was too late.

"He ran into some trouble betting on pool a few years ago too. Didn't have enough money to pay the money he'd  
betted or something. My brother loaned him some and he'd been busing tables ever since." Alex continued, pausing only when  
he noticed Safiya was no longer at his side.

She'd stopped in the middle of the hallway, hand pressed to her mouth to stifle a sob. So that's what he'd needed  
the money for. Instead she'd spent it on her ex-wife to try and win her back before their eventual divorce. When he'd called her  
out of the blue, that seed of resentment had still been embedded so deep in her heart that just hearing that he wanted her money  
had caused her to hang up the phone. She'd been an idiot, and now she was paying for it.

"I'm so stupid." She choked out, Alex frowning. "He asked me for money. That had to be why - and I just...I hung  
up on him. I told him he was just like our parents, only wanting my money when...when he needed help. I turned my back when  
he reached out to me." She didn't know how to make her tears or words stop. "God, I'm a monster."

"Don't say that." Alex's voice was gentle, his hands pulling hers away from her face. "I didn't know him well enough  
to tell you what he thought of his family, but he never spoke ill of anyone. I'm sure he didn't blame you."

"I hope not." She took a few deep breaths, blinking until her eyes stopped watering.

Alex nodded. "The office is close. Shall we?" He gestured the direction they'd been heading.

Safiya only nodded back, not trusting her voice. Alex released her hands and began their walk again, remaining  
silent until they reached Julian's office. Alex rapped on the door, waiting for Julian to tell them to enter before pushing the  
door open.

"Alex! Always nice to see you. Safiya, it's nice to see you again." Julian greeted them, pushing away from his  
desk to stand up.

Safiya was so thankful he didn't ask her about her wet cheeks or inquire about her smudged make up. He simply  
moved to a smaller desk in the corner, where a portfolio book and a file sat, along with a photo of Dylan with their parents. He  
gathered everything and brought it to Safiya, who was already holding her arms out.

"Thank you, Julian." Safiya smiled, hugging her brother's things to her chest.

"Of course. If you need anything else, feel free to stop by again." He offered, and it was the silent support instead  
of vocal apologies that Safiya appreciated.

"Thanks. I'll...uh...let you get back to work." She said before turning to head for the door, leaving Alex with Julian.

A few steps from the door she stopped, fingers gripping her brother's things tight enough they were turning white.  
She didn't want to be alone in her hotel room, the thought alone making her shake. Instead, she backtracked and stood by the door,  
preparing to wait as long as it took for Julian and Alex to finish talking.

Only five minutes later, Alex walked out, eyebrows shooting up in surprise to see her standing there. He moved to the  
side to let her into the office, but she shook her head.

"You said your family owned a bar?" She asked.

Alex nodded. "Yeah. Want directions?"

Safiya nodded, offering her phone's memo app when he asked for something to write with. He tapped away at the  
keyboard, jotting down the bar's address before giving it back. They waved to each other, Alex heading to class and Safiya on her  
way to Sanctuary.


	2. Chapter 2

It was near impossible for Safiya to find a parking spot near the bar, so she circled around until  
something opened up. It was two blocks from the bar, but it would do. She placed her brother's things  
into her tote bag and started walking.

It didn't take long to reach Sanctuary - in fact, she swore it took longer to find her wallet and show her  
ID to the man at the door than it did for her to walk there from her car.

She snagged a free and clean table, placing her bag on the surface. She took a deep breath before  
pulling out the portfolio first, fingers running over her brother's name engraved on the front. Before she  
could flip it open, a waitress approached, ticket pad in hand.

"Hi. What can I get for you?" She asked. Blue eyes, blonde hair, and a body with curves for days, she  
was beautiful and nearly stole Safiya's breath away.

Safiya stuttered for a moment, finally clearing her throat and offering an apologetic smile. "Can I start  
with some gumbo? I haven't eaten anything today and I probably should before I start drinking."

The waitress nodded. "Good idea. I'll be back in a few minutes, cher."

Safiya watched her leave before returning her attention to the portfolio. Certificates, essays, things  
she couldn't identify were placed neatly in clear plastic sleeves. Her brother wasn't in school just for  
history - he'd been well on his way to being an archaeologist. Dylan was brilliant, and Safiya easily  
lost herself reading his work.

She was in the middle the portfolio when the waitress brought her her food. The smell alone warmed  
Safiya, as well as making her stomach grumble. Placing the portfolio back into her bag, she pulled  
her meal closer to her and began to eat, groaning softly at the taste.

"Hey," A man came up to her table, flashing a smile and holding out his hand. "Jake. Don't think I've  
seen your pretty face around here before."

"Safiya." She spoke around a mouthful of gumbo, wiping her hand on a napkin before shaking his  
hand. "I'm just visiting."

"From where?"

"Out of town." Safiya smiled sweetly, swallowing what was in her mouth. "Visiting for a funeral."

Jake's expression went from flirty to grave in moments, his beer bottle tipping in her direction. "Sorry  
for your loss."

Safiya nodded politely. "Thank you. Are you from around here?"

He perked up at the change of subject and nodded. "Yes ma'am. New Orleans, born and bred."

"Exciting. What all is there around here?" Safiya let him talk while she ate, trying to polite but hoping  
to give off the vibe that she wasn't interested in seeing him outside this encounter.

Once she was finished eating, he set his bottle down and offered his hand to her again. "Care to  
dance?"

"No thank you. I'm not really in the spirit. I'm kind of a buzz kill tonight. Sorry."

"Nothing quite picks you up like a good beat and a great partner." He insisted, moving his hand in the  
'come here' fashion.

"Jacob Danvers," The waitress approached with a tray full of dirty dishes, tsking at Jake who'd  
rescinded his hand. "Are you bothering someone who's clearly told you no?"

"Not at all, Miss Aimee. She declined, I'll respect that." He tipped his head at the two of them, grabbed  
his beer, and went in search of someone else to bother.

Aimee turned to Safiya with a smile, taking her dishes and placing them on her tray. "The men here  
may be pushy, but they're harmless. Feel free to signal any of the staff if someone makes you  
uncomfortable."

Safiya nodded. "Thank you."

Aimee gave a small bow then moved off to the kitchen to deposit the dirty dishes. Safiya reached for  
her bag but stopped, reaching for a napkin to clean up her face - surprisingly no make up rubbed off  
except for a little foundation - and moved to a free seat at the bar.

It wasn't too long before the bartender made his way to her, flashing a wide smile. "What can I get you,  
cher?"

Safiya opened her mouth to order, then pointed behind her in the vague direction of the door. "Twins?"  
Though the man she was referring to was nearly identical to the one before her, there were subtle  
differences that had her questioning him.

This man's hair was a darker blond by a shade or two, and his muscle was leaner than that of the man  
at the door. The bartender also looked to be leaning, favoring one leg like the other was injured.

The bartender shook his head to her question. "Quadruplets. Dev's the one at the door. I am Cherif."

Safiya tapped her fingers against the counter in a silent triumph. "Nice to meet you. What would you  
recommend a grieving orphan who needs to drive to her hotel tonight?"

His smile faltered briefly before he shrugged. "Water." He grinned at the little laugh that he'd pulled  
from her lips. "How about a virgin cherry daiquiri?"

Safiya faked a frown before smiling again. "If you insist."

Cherif saluted her before moving to make her drink, leaving Safiya to admire him in silence.

He was tall - taller than she was, and that was the most attractive quality in Safiya's opinion. That  
could explain why she was attracted to everyone. At five foot three, everyone was taller than her. It  
didn't help she was a sucker for blue eyes, even if they were framed by long blond hair.

Cherif returned moment later with her drink. "What's brought in here tonight? Bad day?"

Safiya opted out of telling him her sad back story. "I was at Tulane earlier and this kid Alex said it was  
his family's bar. I don't trust myself to be alone right now, so here I am."

Cherif's face lit up. "Alex is my nephew. He was nice to you, wasn't he?"

"Very. He was very helpful and sweet." Safiya sipped her drink. "This is amazing."

"Sounds like Alex. And thank you." He apologized quickly and moved to serve others, returning when  
Safiya was halfway finished with her drink. "Can I make you another drink, cher?"

Safiya shook her head. "No, I just have a question. My brother Dylan used to work here. Alex said  
one of you helped him with some money?"

Cherif seemed stalled by her words, possibly putting together her words about being an orphan and  
the ones about Dylan being her brother together. He nodded slowly, only speaking once the smile  
returned to his face.

"I knew you looked familiar. Dylan was a good kid." He said kid, but Safiya and Cherif couldn't be that  
far apart in age. "Yeah. My brother Remi pulled some pool sharks off him and paid them off. Told him  
to repay the bar by working for free." Cherif snorted. "We still paid him, we just didn't tell Remi."

Safiya smiled. "That was very kind of him. I'd like to thank him if I could."

Cherif leaned over to the other bartender, mumbling into the other's ear. He leaned back to Safiya and  
gestured to the man he'd been speaking to. "Follow him. He'll take you to the kitchen and grab Remi  
for you."

Safiya nodded and finished her drink. "Thank you for the drink."

"Come back again." They waved to each other, Safiya hopping off her chair and following the other  
bartender toward the kitchen.

She stopped by the door, the bartender taking a deep breath before opening the door and going into  
the kitchen.

.

* * *

"Remi." Called the voice of his least favorite bartender.

"Fuck off." He called back, continuing to scrub the load of dishes Aimee had brought him.

"There a lady out here who wants to talk to you." The voice continued, unswayed by Remi's aversive  
attitude.

"What about my first statement didn't you understand?"

"She wants to talk to you about Dylan Collins. That kid you bullied into working for us? It's his sister."

Remi snorted before he heard the last sentence, those words finally giving him pause. Sighing, he let  
one of the others take over the sink and dried his hands. Taking off his hair net and stuffing it into his  
apron, he followed the other out to were a small woman stood.

She was barely tall enough to reach his bicep, and she was thin enough to seem fragile. It didn't help  
that her cheeks were tear-stained, brown eyes looking from the bartender to him.

"Remi Peltier." He spoke first, her eyes going wide before offering a smile and her hand.

"Safiya Collins." She had a firm handshake, Remi pleasantly surprised. "The...uh…other b- your brother  
told me you helped mine and I just wanted to thank you."

Remi side eyed Cherif, who was not even trying to hide that he was watching them - probably ready  
to jump in incase Remi said something offensive. Remi snorted and dropped her hand, reaching  
behind him to untie his apron.

"Seeing as how I'm due for a break, mind if we talk outside so I can smoke?" He asked, throwing his  
apron behind the bar.

Safiya shook her head, stepping out of the way so he could push through the crowd. People seemed  
to part and let them right through, as Remi was sure the look on his face said the first person to get in  
his way would regret it.

He waved a hand at Dev, who greeted them as they left and walked a little ways from the bar. Remi  
took a seat on a nearby curb, gesturing for Safiya to join him. She did so hesitantly, laying her bag on  
her lap.

"So Dylan," He scratched a finger along his jaw as he thought. "Good kid with a smart mouth. Good at  
pool, but not the best. My brother Etienne convinced him to gamble one day. I guess he bet money he  
didn't have and couldn't pay up. I told him he'd make it up to me by bussing tables and not touching the  
pool tables until he'd paid me back."

Safiya was almost too afraid to ask, but she had to. "How much did he owe?"

"A thousand and something. It wasn't really that much, but I guess to a student that was like not eating  
for a few months. I only helped him out because my brother and my nephew vouched for him and  
begged me to. Like they couldn't have done it themselves." He shook his head.

Safiya smiled softly, staring long enough to make him uncomfortable before she glanced away. "Thank  
you for helping him." She smoothed her hands over her bag. "I wish I'd helped instead, but I'm glad to  
know at least someone was there for him."

Remi tilted his head to the side. It was his turn to study her. "Y'know, he never said anything about a  
sister. He didn't talk about his parents much either."

He knew he'd struck some kind of chord when her eyes welled up, regretting his choice of words. "Yeah  
um….we hadn't spoken in over ten years. Except once when he called me asking for money he needed  
to repay someone." She hung her head and let her hair cover her face, Remi looking away and allowing  
her to have a moment. "My own twin and I held a pointless grudge. Now he's dead and I can't do  
anything about it."

Those words stole the air right from Remi's lungs - they were the words of his worst nightmare. The thing  
he'd been dreading for years coming from a stranger. He choked and gasped, hitting himself in the chest  
to pull that missing air back in.

Safiya looked at him with wide eyes once again, reaching out as if to help him. "Are you okay?"

As soon as he could breathe, he answered "I'm fine." and stood up. She scrambled up after him, holding  
his arm briefly for balance before letting go.

"Are you sure?" She asked, still concerned.

"I said I'm fine. I've gotta get back to work." He walked back toward the bar, not bothering to look back  
and see if she was following.

* * *

Safiya watched him walk away, fearing she'd said something to upset him. Thinking over her words, she  
drew a blank on what could have caused such a violent reaction. And with his dismissive words, she  
wasn't sure going after him was the brightest thing to do.

Slinging her bag over her shoulder, she ran across the street and headed for her car. Once she reached it,  
and out of habit, she checked under the car and the backseat for unwanted guests before getting into the  
driver's seat.

She supposed she could head over to her parents' home, start cleaning things out, but she didn't have  
the ambition to clean up their lives at the moment. She gripped her steering wheel, waiting for the  
opportunity to pull away from the curb and thinking about what to do. If she was being honest with herself,  
she was tired and just wanted to sleep for twelve hours.

She wasn't in a hurry to leave New Orleans - she didn't have anywhere else to be. Her most recent book  
was still being processed, so until that was done she had all the free time in the world. Pulling away from  
the curb she headed for her hotel.

It wasn't terribly fancy, but it was definitely on the higher end. She was on the second floor, and once she  
made it to her room she crawled onto the bed, bag beside her as she closed her eyes and took a long  
needed rest.

When her eyes opened again, the clock on the nightstand read 2AM. She groaned and sat up, rubbing  
her face and sleepily realizing how gross she was.

She crawled off the bed and went to her suitcase, searching for her bedtime shirt and pajama shorts as  
well as grabbing a change of underwear before heading for the bathroom. She groaned again when  
turning the light on, making a face at her reflection twice before turning on the shower.

Setting the clean clothes on the counter, she stripped out of her jeans and sweater, tossing them as  
well as her blue bra and panties into the corner to be gathered in the morning when she cared more.

Stepping into the shower, Safiya sighed contentedly as the warm water ran over her skin. Only once  
she was soaking wet did she remember her shower bag - her body wash, shampoo, and conditioner  
were still in her suitcase. She glared over to where the hotel soap was, hating every moment she was  
scrubbing herself down with the orange scented bar soap.

With the shampoo and conditioner sufficiently doing the job, she left the shower and toweled herself dry  
before pulling on her night clothes. Feeling better now that she was clean enough, she turned all the  
lights off and climbed back into bed.

An hour spent tossing and turning told her she was done sleeping for a bit, so she turned on her  
bedside lamp and pulled out the file of her brother's things she'd received from Julian.

Most of it seemed to be class work and research he was doing, and to her it was boring. All it did was  
spark a novel idea in her head, and the more she read, the more the plot in her mind evolved. She'd  
decided by 4AM that she would write this new book and dedicate it to her brother.

Flipping briefly through the last few pages, a picture caught her eye. It was a tapestry of a man  
surrounded by animals, with a text along the bottom in a language she'd never seen before. Her  
eyebrows knitted together as she stared at it, wondering if it was perhaps an ancient language Dylan  
had been studying.

On the back was her brother's chicken scratch, her tired eyes not able to read more than a handful of  
the words. Deciding to come back to it in the morning, she put it away and shut the lamp off, dreaming  
of this new plot she was eager to begin writing.


End file.
